Friday, September 24, 2010

The Big Wheel Of Death

So a while ago I had a dream involving Bob Barker...so now you know its a nightmare. I was one of the contestants who was told to "Come On Down!!!!" by Rod Rodney. I was so super excited to finally be in contestants row and the 3 other members were equally excited.

The first item up for bid was a china hutch. Everyone went crazy; apparently my subconscious really wants a china hutch. The 3 other contestants put in stupid bids like "one dollar Bob" but I was smart and bid $871. Bob then told us that we had to get the exact correct amount or we would have to spin the big wheel. I was torn, I really wanted the china hutch, but I also wanted to spin the big wheel; it has always been a dream of mine.

Bob then calmly pulled the cue card out of the envelope and read "$871"!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Holy Crap! I just won the freaking china hutch! It was a bittersweet moment because I also wanted to spin the big wheel, which usually qualified you for the showcase showdown.
I watched while the other contestants made their way to the wheel and waited with baited breath for their turn.


Something looked a little off about the wheel though.....


The dollar values were replaced with different types of "prizes." Each square contained a different torture and way to die. There were suddenly pits on the stage filled with different sorts of creatures. There were pits full of tigers, lions, tarantulas, and snakes. The other contestants seemed unaware of their fates and went to spin the BIG WHEEL OF DEATH.

The first contestant spun the wheel and landed on the snake pit. Bob Barker escorted the contestant to the pit and then shoved him in while laughing maniacally. This process continued for the other contestants in the tiger and tarantula pits.

Bob Barker then approached me and congratulated me on my awesome win of a china hutch.

I woke up with a new respect for Bob Barker and a leery attitude toward the Big Wheel.